< Previous Post: | Next Post: >

When You Feel Like an Inadequate Mother

Hope for every mom who feels like she's not enough. Mary, Jesus' mother, was chosen by God - so are you. Plus 3 more messages from God found in her story.


Have you seen this phrase going around on social media?

“I have been perfectly blessed and assigned by God to be the mom my kids need.”

I’m not sure where it originated, but I cringe almost every time I read it. I know it’s meant to encourage and strengthen. I know that the sentiment is true. More often than not, though, my heart responds with a spirit of defeat rather than victory.

I don’t usually feel like I’m capable of this parenting process I’m in the middle of.

Sometimes I think it’s ’cause my parenting began through adoption. My kids aren’t my flesh and blood. The ability to understand them isn’t genetically hard-wired. But I know biological mamas who feel like they’re the wrong mom for their kids too.


Do you ever feel the way I do?

Like you don’t know what you’re doing in this mom position?

Completely unprepared for the challenges?

Lacking any idea how to handle these kids . . . this phase . . .

Just plain not cut out for the job?


Let’s think about Mary, the mother of Jesus, for a minute. Do you think she felt like she would be an adequate mother for the Son of God?

But God CHOSE her!


When God chose Mary to be the mother of His only Son, He sent a messenger to comfort and encourage her. Here’s what the messenger said:


1) You Are Not Alone

The angel greeted Mary by announcing, “Hail favored one. The Lord is with you.” (Luke 1:28)

2) Don’t Panic – God Is Trustworthy

Understandably, Mary was anxious about this visit, so the angel said, “Do not be afraid.” (Luke 1:30)

3) This Isn’t All Up To You

When Mary questioned the reasonableness of the message, the angel responded with, “Nothing will be impossible with God.” (Luke 1:37)


Mary might have had the same insecurities you and I do, right? Yet consider her response:


“Behold, the bondslave of the Lord; be it done to me according to your word.”

(Luke 1:38)


She accepted the work God chose for her. Didn’t complain. Didn’t argue. She was willing to serve God His way. She humbly submitted to His plan.


And her attitude didn’t change when she spoke to her friends. Look at what she focused on when she visited her cousin, Elizabeth. It wasn’t her difficult predicament.


Mary exalts the Lord. Luke 1:46-55


Mary focused on God.

God’s worth.

God’s ability.

God’s provision.


Was being the mother of God’s Son going to be easy? No!

It almost got her killed.

She became a social outcast.

Even after Jesus was born, she had to flee for her (His) life.

As He grew and matured, she couldn’t keep track of Him!


You and I are not the first mothers to feel inadequate. It doesn’t matter if you gave birth to your kids or adopted them. We did not know what we were getting ourselves into!

But God did! He knew it would be hard. He knew you couldn’t do it alone.

Yes, He even knew what He was doing when He chose your kids for you!


The very same faithful, unchanging God who chose Mary to be Jesus’ mother has chosen you and me to love, nurture and train the very children He has placed in our homes!


And He sends you and me today the same message He sent to Mary so long ago.

You have been chosen for this job.

You are not alone.

You can trust God’s plan.

This is not all up to you.


So don’t focus on your inability. Recognize it, but don’t stop there.

Focus on God. His worth. His ability. His provision.

Next time you feel like an inadequate mother, remember the words of 2 Corinthians 9:8-11.




Your sufficiency begins and ends with God.

Your kids have been assigned to you by God.

Trust His plan, and He will bless you with wisdom, courage and strength to be the mom He wants them to have.

Remind yourself of these truths with this free print:

Click Here to Print Your Own Copy

Free printable for any mother who thinks she's not enough.


You might also like:

Women Who Challenge Me to Be the Best Mom I Can Be

The Only Way to Parent With Confidence


This post was originally published as part of the Imperfect Moms Confessional Series where you’ll find lots of inadequate mothers being real and encouraging one another to live in grace.


Shared at: Grace & Truth, Coffee & Conversation, Thoughtful Thursday,

Featured at:



  1. What a beautiful reminder. I often feel inadequate, and I’m so thankful to know God is the one in control.

    • So glad you stopped by, Heather. What an encouragement to know that we serve a God who makes up for our lack, remaining faithful even when we are faithless. Enjoy your weekend!

  2. Thanks for this post, Abi! I have chosen to feature it on Grace and Truth today! Be blessed.

    • Thank you, Aimee! What a blessing Grace & Truth is as you ladies all help spread encouragement and hope around.

  3. I love this Abi and the printable you included is just perfect. I need reminders like these because I tend to be hard on myself as a mom.

    Thanks for sharing.

    • Oh, me too, Jennifer! I have a few printables taped inside my pantry door so I can read them when necessary. Hope you have a wonderful weekend, trusting God to help you love your husband and kids and be the wife and mom He wants you to be. 🙂


  1. […] post might help us int his area.  In her post When You Feel Like an Inadequate Mother, she offers sound Biblical advice, truth, and wisdom.  I love how she reassures us moms – […]

  2. […] you ever feel like an inadequate mom, know that you’re not alone. And it’s […]

Your turn! I'd love to hear your thoughts or questions.